i might have to move to japan

i just happened upon this article, and now i have to figure out how to pack up the dogs and cat and ship everybody over to japan to live out our days in a land completely devoid of the types of people i regularly see at wal-mart.

if you don't want to check out the article, basically what it says is japan has made it illegal to own a waistline that is over a specified number of inches - one limit for men and one for women (and the women's number is higher! equals we win!). even as i sit here expanding due to lack of exercise and an increase in bar exam failure-induced alcohol consumption, this whole idea makes me just giddy. the japanese are a beautiful people. case in point, this quote from someone really important:

“I don’t think the campaign will have any positive effect. Now if you did this in the United States, there would be benefits, since there are many Americans who weigh more than 100 kilograms,” or about 220 pounds, Mr. Ogushi said. “But the Japanese are so slender that they can’t afford to lose weight.”